To 2011 and hoping a lot of the things that we have been working toward become a reality. 2010 has been a difficult year and I'm not sad to see it go. We have been through some big changes and I cannot, as of yet, weigh in on my feelings about all the things that have happened. It's too soon for me to put how I really feel about our new home, Josh's new job and Oklahoma in general into words and I'm afraid that the newness, scariness, sadness, and emptiness that goes along with so many epic changes will make a fair assessment impossible. So, I will not go there. Not yet.
As always, I am thankful that we have our health and that our boys are healthy, happy and well-adjusted. I look up to them in so many ways and they inspire me to to be a better mom, wife and person every day. I appreciate the love and support that my husband gives and try to understand that he is just a man who loves a woman who is insane. The sane part of me wants to wrap him up in all the love I have and be thankful that he hasn't entered the Witness Proection Program and disappeared into oblivion. The insane part of me wants to wrap him up in cement and throw him off a bridge. Fortunately, he is a lot bigger than me and I wouldn't make it very far in my insane plot.
I miss my family and friends. Some days, I'm perfectly happy to be miserable on the couch. There is a physical symptom of homesickness that I was unprepared for. Some days the knots in my stomach and emptiness in my chest are as noticeable as a headache that threatens but never quite shows up. Other days, it is like a migraine that rocks my world and throws everything off-kilter. I keep telling myself that this is just a part of adjusting to being so far away and that this will pass and everything will get better in time. I hope I'm right. Time will tell.
There are many things to look forward to in 2011 and I can't wait to share them with you all. Josh and I will celebrate 10 years of marriage and I will be turning (gulps) 30. We have trips both back home and to far away places that we are looking forward to. Because of all the good stuff ahead, I will be drawing a line at midnight tonight -
All things 2010: DO NOT CROSS THIS LINE!!
Love and hug to all.....until we see each other again,
Aub
I'm so glad that you are thinking positively! It's difficult to practice gratitude, when you've been faced with so many challenges. I'm hoping the new year brings you many wonderful things!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Lisa! I wasn't feeling very positive when I wrote this and I'm glad it's translating as a positive post! :)
ReplyDeleteI'm trying to remember that there ARE things to be thankful for, even though the year has been riddled with sadness and sprinkled with disappointment. Thanks for following!
Thanks for stopping by my blog for ICLW! I am also somewhat displaced and missing my hometown... I know how that feels! Your sons are gorgeous!
ReplyDeleteRosie
I am sorry you are homesick. I understand. When I moved(an hour away) I became so depressed. I am very close to my family.
ReplyDeleteICWL thanks for dropping by my blog.
ReplyDeleteSorry you had a tough 2010, hope 2011 brings better things for you and yours.
Thanks for stopping by my blog! I hope 2011 is off to a better start for you!
ReplyDelete~ICLW #156
Thanks for visiting my blog! I'm so sorry to hear that the last year has been so rough for you. Starting over in a new place is definitely a hard thing to do. My hubby and relocated about 4 years ago and I'm just starting to feel like this is really home, but for me, it gets better and easier all the time. Now when I turn onto our street and see our house, I'm so happy to be home again. I hope you find more happiness in 2011.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the comment Aub! I wish you the very best in 2011 - new adventures to come, right? Thanks for making me giggle tonight - I certainly needed it :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by my blog! You haven't updated in awhile... has your blog moved to another location?
ReplyDeleteHope 2011 is going great - your boys are stunning!
ICLW :)
I hope your 2011 is going well so far. :-)
ReplyDelete